Episode 31: Your ego is not the enemy

Your ego is not the enemy.

Welcome to the Self-Performance-Strategies (S-P-S) Podcast


The main Quote:

Check your ego at the door. The ego can be the great success inhibitor. It can kill opportunities, and it can kill success.

Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson


The main takeaways:

Your ego is not letting you grow. 


Do you get overwhelmed, stuck, and frustrated quickly?

Let's fix this.


Your past is clashing with your future: 

Your ego loves all your bad or comfortable habits. 

From your thought patterns to wasting hours on social media.

When you try to change, your ego says no. 

But often, the ego voice is hard to hear.


Why can't I hear my ego? 

You overwhelm yourself with worry, busy work, and distraction. 

The ego is playing 4D chess, and you're playing Hungry Hippos, snapping up any form of distraction that comes your way. 

You need to become the Bobby Fischer of your mind.


Learn to play mental chess: 

Spending more time alone is the biggest shift you can make to allow yourself to grow. 

Simple, yes, very hard to build a habit. 


Because your ego doesn't want you to reflect, think, and be with your inner source. 

Your ego is good at this game.


You will see improvements quickly: 

Even a couple of minutes alone in the morning before your work will make a significant difference. 

Instead of jumping straight into overwhelm and distraction for the day. Your 1st chess move is intentional. 

One move at a time is how you win.


Momentum will build: 

You start stacking your wins. 

You start seeing how your ego was pulling you into overwhelm and distraction. 

You had some underlying emotional fears and doubts about your new direction. 

You can see how the ego was moving you away from these emotions.


You make your moves: 

You now understand why the ego distracted you with busy work and bad habits. 

You face your fears and doubts, and you make some key moves to improve your deserve levels in life. 

Because YOU deserve SUCCESS. 

Don't let the ego tell you otherwise.



Using the power of reflection, planning, and intention. 

You defeat the ego, and you leave overwhelm and distraction behind you. You and your business start to grow again. 

You won. 

But… It's time now, time to face the next ego grandmaster. 

Get ready to move.


7 ways to defeat your ego at mental chess.


The ego is a tool to be used and controlled, not an enemy to fight. 

Lead yourself and lead your ego to help you succeed in your business.


Stop getting offended:

The behaviour of others isn't a reason to get upset. 

If you let things offend you, it only weakens your energy. 

As Christopher Hitchens says, 

"Those who are determined to be 'offended' will discover a provocation somewhere."


Your ego is convincing you that the world should be how you want it to be; it doesn't work like that.


Please stop it.


You don't need to win all the time:

Your ego loves to divide the world into winners and losers, but this is not true. 

Because ultimately, winning is impossible all the time. 

Someone out there right now is faster, younger, healthier, and smarter than you.


Does that make you a loser? 


Of course not. 

So don't let your ego make you feel worthless or insignificant. 

Because you are not. 

Let go of needing to win by not agreeing that the opposite of winning is losing. 

That is your ego's fear, not yours.


You are not right all the time:

Your ego is the source of a lot of conflict and disagreement. 

Because it wants you to be right, making other people wrong. 

Letting go of your need to be right is very powerful. 

Even letting people win, even when you know they are wrong.


Is it a big issue? 

Will it matter in 5 mins? 

No, then back down and move on. 

If you are open to being wrong sometimes, you can flex your humility and grow; your ego no longer blocks your path. 

You save yourself so much energy and can focus on more important things.


Don't be superior: 

Authenticity isn't about being better than someone else. 

It's about being better than YOU used to be. 

Stay focused on your growth, be humble, and help others. 

With success, your ego will want to tell you that you are better than everyone.

While you might be more successful than others, there is no need to start acting like a d*ck.


Empathy > Ego


Know when to stop: 

The ego is never satisfied. 

No matter how much you achieve or acquire, your ego will want more. You'll find yourself in a perpetual state of striving and reaching for a new end goal. 

Making it so you never truly arrive at any of your goals.


The thing is, you've already arrived and succeeded. 

When you detach from the need for the goal. 

You may even find it easier to get to. 

Also, you become more grateful because you realize how little you need to be satisfied in life.


You are not your reputation or achievements:

Hear me out; it is impressive to have accomplishments.

But be grateful for them.

The less you need to take credit for your accomplishments or have people recognize them.

The more you are free to achieve in life.


When your ego attaches who you are to those achievements, and you believe your own hype. 

People might not want to work with you again. 

You also start to build a bias towards your way based on past experiences. 

Be open, be cool, be helpful.


Let go of control:

The ego wants to control and micromanage everything. 

As my good friend, Epictetus tells me: "

There is only one way to happiness, and that is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the power or our will."


It helps if you regularly remind yourself and your ego of what is in your control and what is not. 

It sounds simple, but it is not easy. 

Your ego will always want to come 1st. 

You have to control it and move it around your mental chess board to succeed in life.


Stephen links:

Get my free Kinetic Flow Program here and learn how to save 10 hours a week:



PRO-Accelerator, select a time here:


Visit the website:



Follow me here:






Big love.

Make it a great one,